Conjugal calamity

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    WHAT STARTED with Haiyan extended to Hagupit. Not just the continuing devastation of Eastern Visayas but the       scourge of what has come to be some kind of a conjugal calamity impacting on the whole Filipino nation. The intensity  of which corresponding to the typhoon category. 

    This is the ultrastorm named Mar-Korina. Recall how at the time of Haiyan, Interior and Local Government Secretary   Mar Roxas made a calamity of himself in dealing with the local government units of the devastated areas, notably   Tacloban Mayor Alfred Romualdez.

    Soundbytes now immortalized: “You have to be careful because you are a   Romualdez and the President is an Aquino.”  The mayor asked by Roxas to cede his authority to him – Roxas, before   relief, rescue and retrieval operations could ensue in the city buried in debris and littered with decaying    bloated bodies.And should Romualdez refuse: “Bahala na kayo sa buhay niyo.” 

    The other half of the calamitous pair,   Korina Sanchez storming thus: “Hindi alam nitong si Andreson Cooper kung ano ang pinagsasabi niya.” Referencing to the CNN anchor’s criticism of government’s bungled response to Haiyan. Sanchez making judgment in  the comfort of the ABS-CBN studios.

    Cooper broadcasting  amid the stench of death and decay in the howling   wasteland that was Leyte. Onto Hagupit now. Sanchez on national television, expressing prayerful hope that the superstorm spared the  Philippines: “Kaya pa natin idasal yan para lumihis.”

    To co-anchor Noli de Castro’s wish that the typhoon’s impact be split with the other direction that was Japan, Sanchez responded: “Puwede bang sa kanila na  ang lahat?”  And when De Castro said hopefully not, Sanchez: “Sa kanila na lang lahat. Parang mas kaya nila.”

    Sheer schadenfreude. Total tactlessness.  Insipid insensitivity. What about Roxas?  Yeah, he was on ground  zero directing operations, taking charge of assessments of death and destruction which, two days after Hagupit’s first of many landfalls, remained  unassessed.

    Why, even the casualty figures conflict – the Red Cross had    23 fatalities as of early Tuesday, the National Disaster Risk and  Reduction Management Office had an “official   list” of 2 dead.What became the ultimate poster picture of  the Hagupit devastation though was helmetless  Roxas falling off a motorcycle in Eastern Samar.

    The presumptive presidential bet of the Liberal  Party presumed to be  monitoring the situation  in the typhoon-affected areas. Yet another publicity gimmick – the netizens  instantly  ridiculed and dismissed Roxas’ fall. 

    The latest in a string of epal- itis that started with Mister Palengke at the time   Roxas was GMA’s  trade secretary, morphing to Boy Padyak when he aspired for the presidency before reducing himself to be PNoy’s veep, evolving to Mister  Kargador when he carried a sack of rice in a  police raid at some warehouses hoarding the  cereal, to Boy Traffic when he tried to untangle a traffic gridlock at Commonwealth Ave. during the President’s last SONA, to Mister Commuter when he rode the MRT, ostensibly for showand- tell. 

    With his  motorcycle fall, it’s now Boy Semplang for Roxas. Most fitting of his myriad monikers, in keeping with his epic failure  in dealing with disasters,  moreso in his non-performance in all the government posts he has held – trade secretary   amid the soaring prices of commodities,  transportation and communications secretary amid the dysfunction and   degradation of  airports, public transports, the LRT, the MRT which he bequeathed to his more dysfunctional  successor Secretary Pabaya, interior and local  government secretary amid the meltdown of the PNP.

    Indeed, Boy  Semplang – ominous of a  Philippines under a Roxas presidency. Add the Korina factor there and double the jeopardy that shall rise out of this ridiculously horrifying conjugal calamity.   

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