“IS THAT an issue? Is it wrong? Tarzan also gave hams. Why not ask him? Balu ku naman bata nakang Tarzan .”

Thus texted Vice-Gov. Joseller “Yeng” Guiao to this paper’s reporter Joey Pavia in response to the latter’s request for his comments on reports that he – Guiao – distributed hams in Angeles City last Christmas season.

“You are not looking for news, that’s your excuse for raising irrelevant issues against me. Wag na tayong maglokohan. Kilala daka.”

Guiao texted a second time, in response to Pavia texting it was perennial congressional candidate and once presidential aspirant Chito Bacani and former Magalang Mayor Pablo David that raised the ham issue.

“You know what I mean. It’s political propaganda. You are allowing yourself to be used.” Guiao texted a third, and last, time.

Meanwhile, incumbent 1st District Rep. Carmelo “Tarzan” Lazatin reported to his constituents that his bill seeking to establish a stem cell center in the country has been approved by the House Committee on Science and Technology.